A Work at Home Mom’s Blog

I should really be writing right now, but I’m so frustrated. In fact, I’m beyond frustrated. I don’t think there’s a word to describe how frustrated I am right now, although a long string of four-letter ones would probably get the point across. But I’ll spare you from that.

You see, my computer didn’t come with Microsoft Word. It wasn’t really a big deal to me when I got it, because WordPerfect suited my light word processing needs just fine then. But when I started writing, I had to turn assignments in in Word format. WordPerfect can save in .doc format, but sometimes it screws up the formatting. So after a while I decided it was time to get MS Word.

Back then I had a little money to spare, but I was trying to get by as cheaply as possible. So I searched online for the best deal I could find on MS Word. Everything was in the hundreds of dollars, and I thought that surely I could get by cheaper than that. I finally found an OEM copy of Word 2000 for around $30, so I jumped on it.

The CD-ROM came in the mail a few days later, and I set about installing it. Or I tried to. I kept getting errors, and after several hours of frustration for me and strange noises from my CD-ROM drive, I gave up. I called customer service, and they said they would ship me another one out right away. They did, and it arrived a few days afterward.

I popped that one in the drive, only to hear similar sounds. Not good. But I wrestled with it, hoping I could just get it on my computer and get on with my life. I finally managed to install the most basic requirements of the program and get it to work. That was a task in itself, but it made me happy.

My MS Word has always been a little buggy, but I managed to get my work done without incident for the most part. But then last week, it just ceased to work like it should. I could no longer open a file from the menu, and composing and editing began using way too much memory and processing power. When it became virtually impossible to do anything with it, I began looking for alternatives.

I tried WordPerfect again, and it keeps screwing up my formatting even if I start over from scratch. I’ve also tried Zoho (an online word processing program that saves in .doc format), but it’s driving me nuts too. I’m considering trying Google Docs, and seeing how much I despise the big G lately, that should tell you just how desperate I am.

I would love to buy Word 2007 and be done with it, but that’s simply not possible right now. If I had known what a pain this was going to be, I would have invested in a newer version in the first place. I guess I’ll know next time, huh?

I’ve got work piled up to do, as usual. I’ve got 10 articles and a report that must be done by next week. Not a lot really, but I also have about 30 other articles I need to get done as soon as I can. Even that’s not all that much, but my brain has been like mush lately.

It’s not that I’m writing about complicated stuff like rocket science or how DNA testing works. It’s fairly easy stuff that I have a pretty good handle on. But I’ve had a lot on my mind lately, and am still having issues with concentration. I made very little last month because of it, and I can’t afford to have that happen this month. We’ve got to get caught back up on the bills.

If I can just get started maybe it will all fall into place. But if I keep sitting here spinning my wheels, it definitely won’t.

I’m still stuck on the same writing assignment that I was stuck on 3 or 4 days ago. That one needed to be done a week ago, and I’ve got another one I need to get done ASAP. I also have a project I need to get done by Monday, but I don’t know if I will make it or not.

I’ve definitely got to talk to the doctor about this when I go in next week. I don’t like the idea of going on meds, but if they will help, I guess I’m willing to try. I can’t go on not being able to concentrate. If I don’t start getting work done sooner, I’m afraid I will start losing clients. And all of the clients I’m working for now are really awesome, so it would upset me greatly to lose them. Never mind the fact that looking for new clients takes a lot of time, and I don’t get paid for that time.

The only thing I’m having any success with at all is very small assignments, like 150 words or less. And sometimes I can’t even get through those in one sitting. It’s like a bunch of screws have popped loose in my head or something. Is it showing in my writing? Feel free to comment and let me know.

Do you ever have days when you’re just not “with it?” I do. In fact, I’ve been having them for several weeks now.

I’ve had trouble concentrating since Hubby got sick and through our whole housing crisis, but things have gotten better on that front. But my lack of concentration has gotten worse. Sometimes I can’t even finish a short article without taking an extended break. And in case you haven’t noticed, I’ve even fallen off the NaBloPoMo wagon by not doing daily blog posts.

At times I’ve wondered if I’m getting tired of writing. I’ve pondered changing careers, perhaps going into TV repair or designing custom boxes. But after some thought, I realized that’s not the problem.

My lack of concentration has spread to other areas too. It seems that no matter what I’m doing, my mind wanders to something else. I’ve got a doctor’s appointment next week, so I’m going to talk to her about it then.

I hope we get it all straightened out. I was so looking forward to taking my writing to the next level, maybe publishing an ebook and getting some print credentials. But if I can’t even write a short web article, it’s not going to happen.

Today my DSL was down yet again. This is becoming way too common lately, and it’s really cutting into my work time.

This time it was down almost all day. I came home from a side job this morning to find it non-operational, called the phone company, and they said there were no reports of when it would be fixed. I kept checking to no avail until about an hour before I had to make a quick trip out of town.

I got cleaned up and had a few minutes to spare. I checked again, and was able to get my email and check a forum. The timing sucked, but at least I would be able to get some work done when I got back. Or so I thought.

I got back home, turned on my computer, and the DSL was down yet again. Lovely. I called the phone company back, and they told me the same thing. So I proceeded to try to do a thing or two around the house, checking intermittently. Nothing.

It finally came up sometime before 10:00 pm. And now I’m too tired and frustrated to work. Deadlines are creeping up on me, and I was supposed to go back to the side job tomorrow morning. I may just have to skip it and work on my writing. If the DSL is working, that is.

I’m still busting butt trying to get my articles done. So there will be no home theme post today. Lucky for me, writing posts that have to do with the NaBloPoMo theme is not a requirement for participation. I didn’t even have to write this since I’ve already done one post today, but I thought I would explain for those of you eagerly awaiting the next installment.

Back to work now… I’ll pick up where I left off tomorrow.

I have been holed up in my office all weekend. I’ve got to get caught up on my articles. I know I’m not going to get it done by blogging, but I just had to get away from them for a minute. If I don’t, I’ll drive myself crazy.

I spent way too much time on some articles about products I had to do yesterday, but it really couldn’t be helped. Some of them were easy, such as a couple of Amazon books with good descriptions and lots of reviews. But others were extremely hard to find information on, and besides that, were not things that I had much knowledge about in the first place. I did the best I could with them, and I hope that’s good enough.

Today I’ve got twenty-some-odd articles I need to get done. I’ve done that many in a day before, but I’m having a tough time with these. They’re not about subjects I can write about off the top of my head, so I’m having to do a lot of research. And for some of them, there’s just not much information to be found. So it looks like I’m going to have another rough day.

I finally got caught up on my writing work, and I’m even slightly ahead. My clients are happy- so happy, in fact, that they’ve taken it upon themselves to make sure I have enough work to keep me booked up for a couple of weeks. As us southern girls say, “Yee-haw!”

It doesn’t look as though I’m going to have the weekend off this week. In a way that sucks, because it’s supposed to be warm and pretty out. But money is tight right now, so it’s good that I’m going to be making some. As soon as we get ahead on the cash flow, I’m going to see about cutting back a little on my work for others so I can get started on one of the ebooks I’m planning. I’m making a little passive income with affiliate programs, but I think a good ebook could keep me from having to worry for at least several months to come. And that will translate into more weekends off in the long run.

I suppose I should quit blogging now and get back to work. Now that I’m ahead of the game, I’d like to stay there as long as possible.

There was an article in the New York Times last month about how bloggers are overworking themselves to the point of exhaustion. It was even insinuated that blogging might be to blame for some recent deaths. Who writes this stuff?

There’s no doubt that stress is a killer. But blogging in and of itself is not a cause of stress. Not unless you let it be. For me, blogging is a very positive thing. Let me tell you a little bit about why blogging makes me happy.

I started blogging in 2006. I hadn’t been online for a long time up until early that year, and I started browsing blogs. I thought about starting a blog, but I wasn’t sure that I wanted to open up to the whole entire world like that. But it kept eating at me for some unknown reason, and it seemed like everyone else online was doing it, so I finally gave in. I opened an account at Blogger.com, and I got started.

It took me a while to get comfortable with it, but eventually I did. At the time I was working the night shift at a factory job, but I was trying to find a way to work at home. I wrote about my experiences in hopes of being an inspiration to other moms who wanted to do the same thing (even though I wasn’t having any luck).

I started blogging fairly regularly, because I was really beginning to love it. Then I found out I could make money blogging, and that made me ecstatic. I didn’t make enough to quit my job, but it helped me get some extra money to help with my quest to go into business for myself.

I started some more blogs, and I kept trying to find some way to work from home. I tried direct sales, but I really sucked at that. I bought a website, and started making a little money with that, but it wasn’t as much as I was making blogging. Then I got mad and quit my job, and I really began to feel the pressure to make something work.

Then it hit me why I hadn’t been able to say no to blogging in the first place: I love to write! Why not become a freelance writer?

I nearly talked myself out of pursuing that idea before I even tried it. After all, I didn’t have any formal education in writing or English. And I wasn’t that good of a writer… was I? But I finally decided that I had nothing to lose, so I started applying for online writing jobs.

Unfortunately, I got no responses. I ended up having to take a horrible job to help make ends meet, and I gave up on my dream of becoming a writer. I still blogged though, because I enjoyed it and it was helping me bring in money (and vent my frustrations about the whole situation).

Several months later, I got an email from a mailing list I had signed up for that included some information about a new company that was taking applications for ghostwriters. At first I dismissed it, but it kept eating at me in much the same way that the idea of starting a blog did. I trusted my instincts, and I applied. That very evening, I received an email- but not from the company I had just applied to. It was a lady I had written to when I first started applying for writing jobs, informing me that the project she was previously recruiting for had been shelved but she needed writers for a new project. I literally did a happy dance!

I also heard back from the other company the next week, and ended up getting that job. And somewhere in that time frame I got an ongoing blogging gig too! And that, ladies and gentlemen, was the beginning of my writing career.

I eventually was able to quit working outside the home, and now here I am working my own hours and enjoying life much more than I did before. Things are far from perfect, but I love what I do for a living, and that makes a big difference in one’s entire outlook. And it all started with blogging.

That’s not the only reason I like to blog, though. I still like being able to complain about the hideous color of my house (nope, haven’t gotten around to painting it yet) and brag about Pumpkin’s grades anytime I want to, even if nobody at home wants to hear it. And I still make a fair amount of money from it, which helps with the bills right now and will hopefully buy me and my family some nice things once our finances are looking better. So I can safely say that blogging is not killing me. It has made my life better in numerous ways, and I plan to be blogging until I’m old and gray. I might keel over in front of the computer, but I dare them to blame it on blogging.

Here’s a little video I made about why blogging makes me happy. It’s full of my favorite cheesy happy tunes, and it tells an abbreviated version of the above story in case you couldn’t make it through reading the whole thing. Enjoy!

I’m finally beginning to get through my chronic writer’s block. It’s slow going, but I’m back up to getting a few pages a day done now (as opposed to a few pages a week). I’ve got some deadlines looming on the horizon, but if Hubby will refrain from interrupting me, I think I’ll make them.

Now maybe I won’t have to worry so much about having enough money to pay the bills. That’s all I’m concerned with right now. Once I get that squared away, maybe I’ll work toward having extra money to spend on stuff for the house, luxury watches, month-long vacations and such.

One thing that’s helping me is an increase in smaller assignments. I have a couple of sources that give me lots of small things to work on, things that don’t require a great amount of brainpower but do get the thoughts flowing. Since I can do several of them in an hour’s time, the money works out to be about as good as the larger assignments (occasionally better). I can knock out a few of them, then I’m ready to tackle bigger stuff.

I hope things continue to improve on that front. Sitting in front of a computer screen for hours and hours a day and not getting anything done is much more draining than actually producing results, and it’s not nearly as lucrative.